Not Russian Enough

Chapter 9: Arrival

Dear Diary:

I'm about to see my friend!

I haven't seen him in so long. I hope it's not too awkward.

We've arrived. The awkwardness of the plane ride is over. It's all resolved, but that was a weird minute there in the [redacted] with the [redacted], but at least that's over.

I wonder if it was okay to write that. Oh well, I'm sure it will be figured out later.

"Helloters. I'm dte Svetzelga. I do not know what if you remembering to know me or not. dVhat I work with the Jase... or the Yosef I am meaning. I will bring you to his lavratory for the workings for doing."

Am I remembering her? Hmm, I dunno. She is looking fa... she does look familiar. I'm not sure.

"Will you to following me now please and thank you."

Svetzelga lead us deep deeeep into the depths of the underground tunnels leading down to the evil laboratory of the evil mind controlling scientist known by his evil name of Yosef Notabadguy. But like, for reals though, i did not expect it to be buried this far underground. This is quite the walk. I think we've been at this for about a half hour now. Insane.

"Still vwriting down all the reports are dja?" Svetzelga inquired.

"Yeah, I gotta write down everything I do pretty much. Don't know how well that's gonna work this time though. I'm sure it'll be figured out though."

"Djonk"

We walked in silence for a little bit longer. The tunnels are pretty dark and barren. Nothing really much going on but, hey wait a minute... Is that James Hacker?

"После интервью с Bellybutton меня уволили. Они сказали, что им больше не нужен отдел технических новостей, поэтому я вернулся в Munktanpool, чтобы работать в Notabadguy. Вот где я сейчас работаю. Вот где я сейчас живу. Вот кто я сейчас. Вот я сейчас."

Wow. Sad story. That sucks. Also uh...

"Dude I think they gave your job to Whyton after you left." Why did I say that?

"Whyton Nerdi?"

"Yeah, that's who. Wait, Svetzelga, why am I able to understand Russian? I never got a bellybutton implant."

"Well there's a vlotenmotorn that vlushkat in your mind that cause you to Это куча ерунды на другом языке, поэтому мне не нужно писать настоящее объяснение in your mind so you can understand."

"So it's kind of like the one at home that [redacted]?"

"It's pretty much the same thing. So do you remember me now?"

"Yes I do Samantha."

"That's a problem."

"I figured as much."


[redacted]

Wait, really? You're redacting me?

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