jawsh.mccullaugh.com -- Maybe paper bag man's got
something experimental. Just a thought...
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jawsh.mccullaugh.com -- A poorly named episode for a poorly
named story.
The Bad Guy
Part 5: The Christmas Episode
There I was. That's a good way to
start a paragraph. It has a nice ring to it. It sort of
sounds like something that would begin a movie. I think that it
would be a great way to begin a movie. If this were a movie, I'd
begin it by saying, "There I was." Then I'd say, "Right there in
my office. I was sitting there eating a bagel, because that's
what I do. Bagels sure are a nice way to start the day,
especially if you put peanut butter on them. Peanut butter goes
good on a lot of things, like bananas. Peanut butter is great for
hypoglycemic people because it's got protein in it. That's a good
thing. Very good... Triangle." Triangle's a nice way to end
a sentence I think.
Anyway, I started off to get a briefcase. I
was just walking along when I looked up in the sky and I thought I saw
an alien in the clouds. That's
kinda weird, I thought. I
wonder why aliens would be in the clouds. Maybe it's a
secret plot to take over the earth, or steal all of our thoughts.
Yeah, that's it. Of course, maybe they've already taken
everything we have to know. But why would they still be lingering
around? Oh well.
It was taking awhile to get there, so I started
running. Running is a very tiring exercise. I'll bet one
could get a bit of good exercise from running. Maybe I could
start tracking all of my exercise. I could put it into a log of
sorts. I'll bet it would be a lot easier to remember if I had a
class in which I had to do that. Well, maybe not. I'd
probably forget to do it and end up having to take the class
twice. Somehow, I get the feeling that it might be better the
second time around. Yes, I'd probably look forward to going to
class each time the second time around. Just my luck I'd probably
break my arm and not be able to do much though. Except run.
That running was getting a bit tiring though so I
decided to slow down and cool off. Caves are generally pretty
cool. Maybe I could go caving. It'd probably be pretty
muddy though and full of hole punchers dangling from ceilings.
The hole punchers could be used to punch holes in your cavers card, and
once you get enough holes, you could get a loaf of bread. The
bread would probably be kinda moldy though since it'd be old. I
assume it'd be old since it'd be free. And left in a cave.
I ended up stopping by the DVD store on the
way. I found a DVD there that was a monologue by Jim
Crowkins. There's only one other person I know that's a Jim
Crowkins fan, so I picked up a copy for her. Um... Triangle.
I had to cross a bridge to get where I was
going. Whilst I was crossing the bridge, I happened to see a golf
ball in the water. So, now I've got a golf ball. It's a
real nice golf ball. Somehow, whenever I see that golf ball, it
brings back good memories. Good memories once I weed out one
certain detail. Some guy that could have been somewhere else,
that's all. I hope he's not reading this.
Later on, I decided to stop and get some
lunch. I stopped by some generic place and ended up with
rice. I wonder why there's almost always rice for lunch
there. I mean, is it healthy to eat so much rice? I guess
the Chinese do it, so it must be good. Maybe this is like eating
Chinese. One would think that it might not be very vegetarian to
eat Chinese, but it's okay for veggies cause tofu is vegetarian.
Do you have any idea how hard that was to include in a non-humorous
way? Makes you wonder why I did it or if there's any certain
theme to all of these ramblings this time.
So here's the end of this journey. The
briefcase shop. It was a good journey getting here. A lot
more events that happened that I'd like to put in here and for some
reason, I wish the journey would have taken a bit longer. But
here I am. Now, I'm going inside to get the briefcase.
Never thought that it'd be such a weird feeling receiving it.
Receiving the briefcase is supposed to be a happy moment, but it's a
sad moment. I wish that I could go back and relive the journey to
coming here. There were so many great things on the journey but I
guess that I have to move on now. I've got to find the man with
the paper bag. I've got to keep moving on. I think that
I'll put a penguin sticker on the briefcase though. (Yet another
good memory.)
AUTHORS NOTE: The briefcase
originally wasn't supposed to be symbolic of anything. However,
in this episode, receiving the briefcase is symbolic to the end of the
fall semester. I wanted to make receiving the briefcase a happy
moment, but couldn't. Not after I thought about the direction
this episode was heading. Since this episode was dedicated to
Jennifer, I wanted to make it the one where he receives the
briefcase. Receiving the briefcase was supposed to be a happy
thing, because hanging out with really good friends such as Jennifer is
a happy thing. But somehow, I just had to ruin it. Don't
take that last sentence too far, I'm just talking about ruining the
briefcase thing. Also, not everything that the detective did in
this story were things that specifically I did. Actually, I
wasn't the one who found the golf ball. And really, this is the
only episode in which any of the events are events that are part of my
life. Just the character is supposed to be based off of me.
Anyway, in case you're wondering why this
episode is dedicated to Jennifer, maybe you should have a look at this main page.
So
far it's the
only one I've saved.
Update: Okay, so this is a really late update, but I just figured
I should put this in here. The Jennifer girl that was mentioned in this
article (and several others) actually ended up being my girlfriend for a
little while. Anyway, quite a while back it was discovered that things
really couldn't work out that way, and so we've parted ways. Just
putting this in here now so as to save from questions later. And yes, I
will be keeping these pages here, as they mark a big part of my
life.
Read Part 4, or
read Part 6
because we've
still got to catch the guy with the paper bag.
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