The Bad Guy:

Part 8: The Conference

The next day at work I get a phone call from the chief telling me that I need to go to a conference. A conference? Cool! I always wanted to confer with people about stuff. This sounds official. I'd better wear a suit. I think I'll wear one of those fancy looking suits with the shiny buttons that go all the way down. That'll make me look official. I think I'll even wear a badge that says "DETECTIVE," so that people will know that I'm a detective.

"Where's the conference going to be at?" I asked in an inquisitive manner. Yeah, I just used the word inquisitive. Isn't that impressive?

"The conference will be held in the South Brook Clovefield Memorial Conference Center. It's just off of I-90." That's where everything's just off of. Have you ever noticed that? I mean, nothing ever off of I-16. You never hear anyone mentioning I-16. I wonder if it even exists. Yep, just googled it. It's in Georgia.

"Anything I should bring?"

"Just bring something to take notes with. And don't dress up too much. Just look like a normal person. A nice shirt and slacks and maybe a tie is all. Don't wear a name tag unless they give you one."

No name tag? No fancy suit? Will I be able to survive this conference at all? This really isn't looking too promising. I had become so excited about this conference and now it looks like it'll be a drag. But I wasn't going to let that get me down. Still the fact remained that it was a conference. Those are official.

Once I arrived at the South Brook Clovefield Memorial Conference Center, I received my parking ticket and found a good place to park. Well, it wasn't bad anyway. I mean, long walks are good for your health, right? So I walked up to the center, and went inside to take a seat.

The speaker began the conference with some good jokes about the process of making mustard. Those jokes were downright hilarious. I laughed so hard... man, I wish I would have written them down. They were good jokes.

Next, they introduced the president of South Brook Mustard Mfg. Mr. Don Pretzel was his name, I believe. He gave an interesting speech about the history of mustard and it's influence on our culture today, but still one question remained: Why was I sent to a conference about mustard? I mean, what does mustard have to do with being a detective? Maybe I should eat more mustard... or maybe I should wear a mustard colored jacket! That's it. Mustard colored jackets are so stylish these days. It's got to be because the chief wants me to dress hip. Like teenagers do.

The most interesting thing that I saw at the conference was at the end. They asked Cynthia Walerston to perform the closing mustard ceremony. Now, this ceremony in itself was pretty interesting, but it wasn't the ceremony that was the most interesting thing. No, the most incredibly interesting part of the ceremony was that...

Shock and suspense! What was it? Find out in the next episode of The Bad Guy . Or why not catch up by reading Part 7 ?

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